I didn't picture this...did you?

I Didn’t Picture This

Where do you picture yourself?
Because I didn’t picture this.
Life has a way of handing you scenes
you never auditioned for —
and maybe I should’ve seen it coming,
but here we are.

Sitting with wastemen.
Time passing with every pulse.
Realising the bar is somehow
both invisible — and still too low.

I started thinking about the “trad wife” culture —
but not the glamorous type.
And I don’t even think it deserves
a harsh label.
For some people, it works.
They like the life.
There’s comfort there.
Structure.
Stability.
A rhythm to life that makes sense.

Some people choose it — and it works for them.
Most people work toward it.
And some people are forced into it…
often at a time when they least expect it.

It’s okay if it’s for you.
But you can’t force what it isn’t —
and unfortunately, it still happens in my culture today.

The culture still exists in many forms —
often glamourised, sometimes humble.
Some people dream of it
and live the picture-perfect version.

For others, it was never even in the equation.
Some people want a bit of both —
a kind of “work–life balance.”

And some people use it as an anchor,
rather than a final destination.

I started to think a bit deeper.
It’s strange how people can choose a life for you
without ever saying it out loud.

The only “trad wife” idea that ever crossed my mind
was being married to a footballer —
and yes, I’m joking…
mostly.
It wouldn’t be the worst life.

But even then — they’re not “trad wives.”
They’re WAGs.

So no —
sitting with wastemen was never on my agenda.

I imagined myself fulfilling my purpose,
using my skills,
growing into someone I’d actually recognise.

This isn’t the picture I chose —
but it’s the one I’m repainting.
It’s hanging on my walls and it might be on yours too.

It’s not the Mary Poppins scenery
that ever spoke to me.
If I stepped into a picture —
it wouldn’t be this.

What did you picture for yourself?

Always,

Zahra

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